If I’m honest, I’ll never be Instagram beautiful. 

I’m not into deep filters or plastic surgery.

And I like to sweat in the hot summer sun during long runs. 

But, in full transparency, much of the time being “true to myself” and “real” leaves me feeling pretty rejected by the world.

Because I’m not buying the products.

Because I’m not waiting for the next big thing to teach me how to live.

Because I’m not interested in doing things that aren’t love.

If you, too, find yourself there, here are the three things that help me hold onto the whole every day:

1. You become who you follow. In real life. On social media. On your streaming. And the real problem is, you only become a copied version – still not authentic. So, be mindful of whose life you observe and naturally imitate. What do their actions and words say about their values? And do they really even love themselves? And don’t apologize when life inspires you to unsubscribe or unfollow. You aren’t going that way, and you are freeing free space in your mind and your heart. 

2. Use the filter less. Maybe it’s not exaggerating a story. Maybe it’s looking up from your screen more. Or maybe it’s leaving your phone in the car – period. I read an article the other day about a generation of mothers filtering their children from birth. But I think we can still be a generation of mothers who made the mistakes and learned from them. Every day, we get to choose.

3. Stop pursuing “likes”. In real life. At the workplace. On social media. When we wait for the approval of the world, we pause our life for an impossible dream of perfection. No amount of likes or follows will be enough to help us love ourselves. That has to develop away from the screen. And, I promise you, it’s the kind of quiet peace worth pursuing.

So, I hope you will take a look at not your face or your body, but your life and ask yourself the hard question:

How can I love who I am even more?

I don’t think we were meant to find it out there in the world.

Because once we know our truest self.

We will protect it with our life.

And no number on a screen or scale could ever hurt it again. 

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